2010 – Your Year for Freedom!

The New Year is almost upon us, and I’m here to encourage you that this can be your year to break free from eating disorders and food addiction. I’m definitely not talking about another New Years resolution to lose weight that falls apart after a few days! No this can be your year to surrender this food struggle to God once and for all, but you have to be serious about taking it slow and giving it the whole of 2010…

Last year I lost 32 pounds, simply by following the 3 principals below. In fact when I turned briefly during the year to my “old ways” and took back “control” of my life by following a diet, I picked up some of those pounds again. I got panicky… I wanted to lose some weight before a certain “special occasion” and I found myself back in a downward spiral.. Fortunately I know by now what works and what doesn’t, so I got back to basics and peace returned to my life…

PLEASE HEAR THIS: When you have nothing to prove, no one to please, nowhere to go, and no specific reason to lose weight YOU ARE IN THE BEST PLACE FOR VICTORY. It’s in this place where we start doing things for the right reasons : A HEALTHY BODY, MIND AND SPIRIT! NOT TO LOSE WEIGHT!

So don’t do this because you want to lose a certain amount of weight before that June wedding. Rather commit to doing it God’s way because you want to be healthy for the rest of your life and go to every future wedding and celebration with the peace of God inside your heart, a glowing complexion, shiny hair and yes…the size dress your were supposed to wear…

I am committing to another year of doing 3 things every day to keep my body, mind and spirit healthy:
1. Spending time with God (for a healthy Spirit)
2. Exercise (to keep my body healthy)
3. Chase after my dreams (to keep my soul healthy)

I’m kicking it off with 40 days to make it a habit and other ladies are joining me on our members forum. If you’re not yet a member you might consider doing my first free week and see if this program might be for you.

You can also read this article that I re-posted and do it on your own. It is something you can start doing any time of the year and always get back to if you fall.

365 Days to Change your Life! (Re-post)
DON’T LET ANYBODY FOOL YOU. IN YOUR STRUGGLE WITH FOOD AND WEIGHT TIME IS EITHER YOUR FRIEND OR FOE. EVERY DAY COUNTS! Just think how quickly your next birthday or Christmas rolls around, while you still find yourself stuck.

All the promises that you can loose 20 pounds in 7 days are simply not true. Even if you find that “perfect” diet and loose 20 pounds in 30 days, it’s bound to backfire, leaving you with more weight in the end and an even slower metabolism.

PLEASE BELIEVE ME: THERE ARE NO SHORT CUTS! YOU HAVE TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE FOR GOOD, OR FORGET ABOUT IT!

I have been at that place where NOTHING SEEMS TO WORK! Even after I dealt with all my issues, I kept looking for ways to loose the extra weight I’ve gained over the years. It was a constant battle because after years of dieting my body was just not doing quite what it was suppose to.

So a while back I took up the challenge that I set before many ladies in my small groups and the ladies who joined my online membership site: GIVE IT ONE YEAR – 365 DAYS OF HEALTHY HABITS.

Now this way of eating has absolutely nothing to do with FOLLOWING A DIET. No food restrictions (except if you have a food addiction), no perfect eating required (a treat every now and then is okay) and especially no focus on weight loss!

It’s about changing your life AND ESPECIALLY YOUR HEALTH by consistently eating healthy EVERY DAY FOR ONE YEAR. It’s especially about making up your mind to not be side track by SLOW OR NO WEIGHT LOSS, STRESS, SICKNESS, HOLIDAYS, RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS AND A BUSY LIFE. These things are difficult, but I’m afraid it’s part of life, so you can not let it become your excuse. During this year it is important to COMMIT to CONSISTENTLY eat healthy NO MATTER WHAT!

Of course I knew this would benefit me, and sure enough it did. I lost weight, slowly, but I didn’t gain it back, even though I had a few “weak moments” of turning to junk food.

I also anticipated more energy, and sure enough, it happened.

However, there were other benefits that caught me totally by surprise. After eating vegetables with lean meats and fruit as the main course of every meal for about six months, I realized that while people around me got colds and illnesses, I didn’t. This was huge! We have a big family and as the mom I always got sick with my “patients”, but not anymore.

Another surprise in my gradual transformation: Cravings actually VANISHED!
Not in my wildest dreams would I ever have guessed that there would come a day that I would NOT WANT CAKE! After six months of eating some whole grain cereal and low fat milk when I had sweet cravings, I really STOPPED CRAVING SWEETS altogether. So yes, sometimes I still eat sweets there have been times when I got myself in a bind and had to go through a time of resisting again, but my body is now working with me not sabotaging me. Getting up after a short relapse is so much easier, because for the most part (at least 90% of the time) I eat healthy. Please note: You can fool others and even yourself, but you can not fool your body. If the food you eat is not truly healthy and in it’s purest form, I’m afraid nothing will change. I learned this the hard way:)

I also picked up the challenge to exercise CONSISTENTLY for one year. Not the kind of exercise where you work out like a maniac for 3 days and then take a break for three months (been there, done that). No, rather the kind where you exercise 5 to 6 times a week, NEVER MIND WHAT HAPPENS AND NEVER MIND HOW MEDIOCRE THE EFFORT!

I agree that merely walking slowly forever will not help much, but it is really the consistency that changes your life. After six months, I wanted to up my efforts. I was tired of walking on the treadmill, I wanted to start running! I never thought I would actually like exercise. However this would never have happened if I didn’t FIRST make it a part of my life. Make no mistake I felt sorry for myself EVERY DAY FOR THE FIRST THREE MONTHS and I called out to God every day to help me because I was not going to make it. Guess what, He did, and I am so glad I didn’t give up!

Come on girl, take up the challenge! Consistency in your Spiritual life WILL TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE TOO!

I always thought that this “pray-and-read-your-Bible” every day was just a legalistic thing that we don’t really have to obey. Turns out, we don’t have to, but just like healthy food, it can transform our lives. Sure it might not feel good at first, and it might get “boring” after a month or so, but if you keep at it you will not believe what it will add to your life.

Every day the enemy, the world and the people around us pin “things” to our lives. We get saddled with stress, loneliness, pride, responsibilities and temptations. Imagine yourself walking around with those things, and getting more piled on for a month or a year without being washed by the water of the Word or letting Jesus heal your broken heart with His Word and by his Spirit. It’s unhealthy, like eating junk food for a year. It clogs your spiritual arteries and it leaves you depleted and sick. TIME IN GOD’S PRESENCE AND IN HIS WORD IT’S NOT FOR GOD’S BENEFIT, IT’S FOR US!

Eating healthy, exercising and most importantly, spending time in God’s presence are gifts He gave us. However, the enemy blinds our eyes and the eyes of the people around us so that we believe those gifts are burdens.

ASK GOD TO OPEN YOUR EYES TODAY, SO YOU WILL TAKE A HOLD OF THOSE GIFTS!

TODAY CAN BE THE FIRST DAY OF YOUR 365 DAYS! DON’T PUT IT OFF!

TAKE ONE YEAR:
EAT HEALTHY – IGNORE THE SLIP-UPS
EXERCISE – STOP THE EXCUSES
LET GOD INTO YOUR LIFE BY GIVING HIM YOUR MOST PRIZED POSSESSION: TIME

If I could do it dear friend, so can you! I’m just another girl like you with a lot of issues, but we have an awesome God!

HAPPY NEW YEAR LADIES! i

I WILL SEE YOU ON THE MEMBERS FORUM

Love, Heleen


Turn the Titanic around!

Some of you awesome ladies are doing a 21 day detox with me on our Members Forum. I am getting such good material out of it all, thanks ladies. One thing that keeps popping up is the question of “How do we turn this thing of Food Addiction or Eating Disorders around?”

It is huge really, and like the titanic it turns slowly but surely!

Right now you might feel like a baby who is trying to walk on wobbly legs. You might be dealing with your issues, but don’t see any weight loss. You might be eating better but can’t seem to get a grip on exercise. Or you might not quite get a handle on this surrender-your-life to God thing yet.

Let me remind you of something: To find true victory in this area of your life, you need to MAKE UP YOUR MIND. Just like Daniel we find ourselves in a world full of temptation and we need to go into the battle every day with a heart that is set on doing what God wants.  Like Daniel we have to decide ahead of time: “I will not eat this stuff anymore. I will not defile my body. I will not sin against my God”

However this is easier said than done. I’m sure some people wake up one morning with this kind of RESOLVE. Other humans like me have to walk it out a bit. I came to that place of resolve with the help of God before and stayed there for years at a time. However, other times the enemy stole it from me and I started bargaining again (it’s not so bad, I can eat what I want, I don’t need to spent time with God every day, I don’t have to exercise every week, I’m strong enough…) I’ve came to realize that I would keep feeling out of control (even if it’s just not quite getting a handle on things) until I found that place of firm resolve again.

So what I’m trying to tell you is this: It takes a while to get there. You will very likely first go through a PREPARATION PHASE of falling and getting up when you first make up your mind. Remember the baby learning to walk though: Keep getting up, and keep making up your mind to do the right thing until  that resolve resonates in your heart.

You might have to go through a few 21-days-of-detox or 40-days-of-committing-your-life-to-God, but  NONE OF THOSE COMMITMENTS ARE IN VAIN. Not even the ones where you failed miserably.  It is all preparation to get you to that place of resolve.  As you walk through the struggles and sort some things out with God your resolve gets stronger.

If you get through a few months now, you might be at that place of strong resolve in January. If you start with a detox or 40 day commitment on January 1st, it might take a few months of preparation into the New Year to get there.

It’s hardly ever just about “turning the corner”. It takes time! However, when you do get to that place of strong resolve you will have “grown” a stubborn Daniel-attitude of: I will spend time with my God NO MATTER WHAT. I will exercise NO MATTER WHAT. I will not eat the things that harm me NO MATTER WHAT. Solving problems or stress with food is NO LONGER AN OPTION!

It’s important to note that in that place of resolve weight loss happens, and it sure is a pleasant by-product!

So PLEASE don’t give up ladies. You might be in the PREP PHASE  right now but you are getting there!

Remember Galatians 6:9 “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” (NIV)

In His Love!

Heleen

PS: Week 11 of my 12 Week Online Program deals in more detail with Temptation and setting our hearts on God for good.

Break the Power of a Binge!

How do you prevent a Binge from turning into a whole day (or month) of overeating?

A friend asked this question on our forum, and I realized that it is a common question that I might best answer here on my blog.

Of course, it would be best to not binge at all. However, preventing a binge is easier said than done. If you are on a journey of finding healing for the root issues behind your eating disorder, you might not quite be at the place where you recognize the early signs of a binge (starting in the thoughts and emotions) and thus find yourself still binging from time to time.

You can easily undo all the progress you’ve made with one lousy binge! So how do you keep a binge from taking over your life?

The answer lies in TURNING YOUR BACK ON PERFECTION FOR GOOD!

In Week 10 of my 12 Week Online Program for women with eating disorders, I speak about the huge link between Perfectionism and Eating Disorders. If you have strong perfectionist tendencies, then you might have a tough time trying to break away from binging. The reason: You want to have a 100% perfect day or NOTHING – No middle ground.

To find healing in this struggle and to BREAK THE POWER OF THE BINGE, our focus has to shift. We have to ask the Holy Spirit DAILY (maybe even hourly) to help us shift our focus from:

WEIGHTLOSS to HEALTH

AND

24 HOURS OF PERFECTION to A YEAR OF HEALTH

So what am I trying to say?

If you can change your focus (only with the help of God of course) to not see your life in 24-hour compartments of  “today-I-will-have-a-perfect-day” but rather view your progress over a period of a year, you will not be so devastated by a binge. As soon as a binge loses its power over you, it will start fading into the background of your life, until you don’t binge anymore.

We are so scared of those binges because it makes us spiral down. But if we remember every day that a 90% successful day will give us a 90% month, which in turn will give us a 90% year, things will start to change.

Do you realize that if you throw every binge in the 10% “failure-basket” and get on with doing the 90% of healthy eating, exercise, rest, and drinking a lot of water YOU WILL HAVE AN AMAZING YEAR? You will be healthy, stronger, peaceful and yes some weight loss will be on the agenda.

However, if you keep having “100% success days” and “100% failure days” (the days when you binge and just keep eating because you’ve already “failed”), then you either end up at the same place after a year.

Ask God today to help you change your focus FOR GOOD! A binge has no power over you if you know exactly where to “file” it and remember that it’s just a drop in your big sea of 365 days!

Don’t wait for January ladies, start asking God now for that CHANGE OF FOCUS AND CHANGE OF HEART. Even if you don’t do everything perfectly (like eat some pumpkin pie), if you start focusing on ways to get yourself healthy 90% of the time, you’ll feel peace return to your life!

Lots of Love to all of you beautiful women of  God!
Heleen

 

RESOURCES:

NEW: INDIVIDUAL COUNSELING online or in Beaverton Oregon
Call Heleen at (503) 914-2749 or Schedule online: www.LifeSolutions.io

Click on the image below to learn more about the 12 Week Online Program: Women Struggling with Food

Read my story. Click on the image below to download my ebook: God will I ever be free?

Appetite for Freedom WORKBOOK and DVD.
A great resource for small groups or individual use.
Click on the image below to find out more:

I Challenge you to stay “sober” this Holiday Season!

The above title does not refer to alcohol consumption over the holidays (although it’s not a bad idea) but rather a challenge to stay “sober” in your quest for freedom from Food Addiction.

If you have this problem I don’t have to convince you that binging on high fat and sugary food for a few months (the holiday season) can have serious repercussions. Weight gain, depression and strain on relationships are only a few of the side affects. In fact some people end up in the hospital with serious health issues while others isolate themselves from society and experience severe depression because of the shame that is somehow felt more acute this time of year.

Please take the challenge that I’m extending to you. It’s two days after Halloween and you might have already dipped your hand in the candy bowl, but it’s not too late.

The new year is not the best time to turn this ship around: Right now is the best time for you, please believe me!

Please note that I am not talking about going on a diet! We all know by now that diets don’t work. No, find a program that can set you on the right track and change your life for good. I offer a 12 Week Online Program that can be of great help to you during the holidays, but there are also lots of other great programs out there.

Hear me on this one: EXERCISE IS ONE OF YOUR BIGGEST ALLIES THIS TIME OF YEAR! Consider joining a gym or find a friend who wants to walk with you.  Ask God for wisdom in this area. You will find yourself come up with any excuse possible, but remember IT IS JUST EXCUSES. You need exercise now more than ever. Don’t let the enemy fool you by telling you it makes no difference. People who exercise for at least 30 minutes a day have less cravings and are much more motivated to make healthier food choices.

All of this said: This time of year might be terribly sad and lonely for you and food might be your only friend. However, this “friend’ is false and will turn on you to pull you deeper into a pit of despair. Start reaching out to God and to other people today. Please ask for help, find a group, find a Bible study and find healing. Don’t try and fix this yourself, it’s too difficult!

Please go read these articles on my website where I encourage you to have a different kind of Holiday:
Getting through the Holidays
Eating healthy during the Holidays
Tips to minimize Holiday stress

Come on this can be the first year of many where you have a “sober” holiday season.  A Thanksgiving full of  joy and thankfulness. A Christmas where you enjoy loved ones and God’s presence without the “brain fog” of overeating weighing you down. It can be a holiday season without the physical pain of overeating and without depression knocking at your door.

I dare you to take the challenge! Come on dear sister, you know you want it… a sober Christmas! Jesus came to set the captives free, that includes every person struggling with eating disorders and food addiction

Lots of love

Heleen

PS: If you are a paid member of my program then please have a look at our new Forum at the Member’s Area. There is a challenge on there for you, and we will be encouraging each other throughout the Holiday season.

How do you get rid of CARB CRAVINGS?

25If  I have to sum up my food weakness in one word it will have to be: CARBS! Add some butter and sugar to white flour and I’m in carb-heaven and inevitably in big trouble. Like many other people who struggle with food; carb addiction is a very big reality for me!

I crave carbs, and then I eat carbs and then I crave carbs some more… you get the picture.

Now I’m sure you are all well aware of the big debate that has been going on for years around low carb diets. So let me come clean: I am in no way an advocate for low carb diets, and I am well aware that not everybody benefits from it. However, I am not in denial about the negative effects of too much carbs on my life either. Weight gain for me is directly linked to the consumption of too much carbs. On the flip side, weight loss in my life can be tracked down to every time I removed the carbs from the throne it held in my heart and traded it in for some lean steaks and vegetables (and time with God of course)

In all seriousness, I’ve tried to hang on to my carbs for as long as I could, but without much success. It was undoubtedly the pastries, the fresh white breads, the cakes and the crackers that called to me time and time again, until I started slipping and sliding all the way down into another pit of food addiction.

So let’s have some straight talk: Can we really go without it? And if so, how long will it last before we give in to the “calling of the carbs” again?

The answer: Yes and No.

Yes, we have to try our best to stay away from it, as often as possible, for the simple reason that it is addictive and the more we eat it the more we want it and the worse we feel. There is nothing that packs on the pounds around the middle riff like some good old white flour mixed with fat and sugar. And those dreaded rolls around the middle makes our chances for a heart attack so much bigger! Please note that I’m including myself in this group 100%. The “muffin-top battle”, you know the one where your upper body spills over your jeans like the dough of a muffin to create a “muffin-top”,  has been mine for many years!

No, keeping it up FOREVER is almost impossible. I say almost because I can not speak for the whole world, but only for myself and the ladies I know who have tried to go “cold turkey” about a million times (slight exaggeration, sorry)

So what is a poor girl to do in a society where the doughnut rules breakfast and hamburger and fries are basic lunch staples?

Here’s a thought: The 90% rule

Remember how we talked about making a commitment to go to the gym 5 to 6 days a week never mind how pathetic the effort. We also spoke about just showing up every day, waiting in God’s presence with your Bible study open on your lap, even if you ” feel” nothing at times.

Now, for this week (and the next 365 days) let me encourage you to eat those carbs, but only for one meal a day. Come on, try it. It has helped me so much! If you feel like you simply have to have some chocolate chip ice cream, save it for your most vulnerable time of the day. If you often find yourself eating carbs in the evening like a carb crazy woman, then decide to have it then. The rest of the day, make it low or no carb meals with tons of veggies.
Then, come dinner time, think carbs, just make sure you mix it up with healthy and filling food as well. So have your ice cream, but add some unsalted nuts, healthy granola (made with honey and oats), and blueberries in with it. Or eat your bread, but make it fresh baked whole wheat bread with lean meat and veggies on. Stack 365 of these days on top of each other and you will have much more energy, no more cravings, no more binging, and a smaller waist line.

A word of warning from one food addict to another: Still avoid the carbs that makes you spiral out of control. For instance, if I’m just dying for some potatoes, I will choose a baked potato as part of my “carb meal”  instead of chips or mashed potatoes that can easily set me up for a “carb binge”

Research has shown that eating carbs only ONCE a day (no snacking inbetween on carbs, only snack on meat and veggies) can cut down those cravings.  I’m telling you it works! Now, of course there’s a way to have NO MORE cravings. If you go on a strickt low carb diet, you can seriously have NO MORE SUGAR OR WHITE FLOUR CRAVINGS after 21 days! I’ve tried it a few times, and it works. The problem: It’s too extreme thus not natural and not healthy. Also, the chance of you just giving up and binging on carbs are HUGE! So why take the risk, and spiral down again? It is so discouraging and can set you back again for years!

Eating carbs sensibly (not 12 dougnuts of course!) once a day over a period of time will produce weight loss, and MOST IMPORTANTLY, you can keep doing it through birthdays and Christmas and all the other special days. I’m still quite new to this, but the past few months have been so much easier than the “I will not eat carbs, I will not eat carbs…” that I’ve been doing before. So try it out with me and see if you’re also getting good results:) You might feel tired the first few days as your body withdraws from all the carbs, you might even feel slightly down and have a headache, but IT WILL PASS. Doing the first day is the hardest, but after you’re through the first week things will get much easier. You will feel joy returning to your life as you stop grazing on carbs all day long, and that full, bloated feeling around your upper body will be something of the past.
However, if you just can’t get a grip on your food addiction, you might want to have a look at my 12 Week Online Program or Week 3 on Food Addiction. Sometimes we just can’t put the “crutch” or “idol” down because of underlying pain and issues we didn’t deal with.

Now before you think that I’m super smart, let me tell you that I have some food addict experts to thank for my new enlightenment:) If this seems like something you are interested in giving a shot, go have a look at one of the books I recommend at the bottom of this post. If low carb doesn’t work for you, or you get scared just thinking about it, I recommend Jillian Michaels’ (biggest loser coach) book about different ways of eating that applies to different people, in other words, low carb does not fit all.
For me, low and healthy carbs actually equals a healthy lifestyle.

VERY IMPORTANT: Let me remind you to not get obsessed over ANY of this. God brings some good ideas along our paths, but in the end we have to keep building that relationship with Him and ask Him to help us accomplish it.

You know by now, my dear friend, you can have all the knowledge and great ideas in the world at your disposal, but if God doesn’t help you  implement it permanently into your life, it’s the same old story over and over again.

So bend those knees early every morning, admit that you can’t do it, and ask God for some great interventions and great revelations for that specific day.

Wish I could look you in the eye and tell you…don’t give up…please…quitting is the only wrong move that you can make.

Lots of love

Heleen

Books to read:
The Carbohydrate Addict’s healthy heart program by Dr. Richard F. Heller, Dr. Rachel. F. Heller, Dr. Fredric J. Vagnini
Winning by Losing by Jillian Michaels

EMERGENCY: I have to lose weight fast

How do you feel when you get an invitation to a friend’s wedding, or to go on vacation with family, or to come out East (or West) for Thanksgiving? Do your stomach turn and your blood pressure rise at the very thought of it? Special occasions can be absolute torture for someone with a food struggle. The worst part;  it happens all the time!

I receive emails of sheer desperation from ladies about this topic more than anything else: “How can I lose weight fast without jeopardizing everything “

The truth: This kind of anxiety is very dangerous. It will most likely make you look for a quick fix and a quick fix is just an accident waiting to happen.

The good news: You can use this “occasion” to start your journey, right now, seriously, by grabbing on to God and asking for help (counseling or prayer) to lay down the food (junk food and addictive foods) that always drag you down.

The bad news: You have to be honest with yourself because it will be ONLY THAT, the start of a journey! Serious weight loss, without any regard for the consequences to your health and body, cannot be your main focus. There are safe meal replacement programs on the market that I have used and that helped me lose weight pretty fast. However, if you only do this for a short time, without a coach or a support group, you are very likely to put the weight that you’ve lost right back on (and some).

I’ m sorry that I have to be so blunt, but I can’t lie to women who have already suffered so much. If you didn’t deal with some of the pain from your past or present relationships, you will most likely reach for the quick fix again. This dangerous method might cause you to lose a few pounds (possibly) but it will not be worth the denial, pain, and turmoil you’ll feel inside. It is this emotional turmoil, caused by fad diets or dangerous methods (purging, diet pills, etc), that makes people pick up lies, denial, unbelief, and pride again. So, in the end, all it does is postpone your healing for a few more years!

So if you are still surfing the web, flipping through magazines and TV channels to find a quick solution to this long term problem, then you probably still carry a lot of “unfinished business”.

I know, because I have so been there. We once went back to South Africa for a vacation and because of some issues I still refused to deal with,  I was right back there, on the internet, looking to lose 60 pounds in one month! This was after I have been totally set free from bulimia! I am happy to report that it was 7 years ago, and it didn’t last long, but ONLY because I came back and dealt with my issues and for the first time 100% meant it when I told God “I now truly believe that ONLY YOU can heal me and that NOTHING and NOBODY else can. I am ready to lay down ALL the lies and start trusting you, one day at a time”

Let me try and help you if you find yourself in this very difficult place of needing to lose weight FAST for some occasion:

FIRST: LET’S LOOK AT THE FACTS

  • You will probably not be able to lose much weight before the special occasion, even if you try your best. All the stress doesn’t help. However, if you’re still a few months away from the occasion you do have time to shed a decent amount of weight on either a meal replacement program WITH A COACH in place or a safe program such as Weight Watchers IF YOU ALSO ATTEND A GROUP for support and accountability. Support will help you move forward after the occasion and make it a long term solution instead of a fad diet.
  • Also, when you get closer to the date,  find something you can wear that is slimming and “good enough’ (lower your expectations of perfection). This will take away some of the stress.
  • If you eat the right portions that are high in nutritional value and you exercise, you will get your metabolism to work for you (against the stress hormones) much more than any fad diet, diet pill, or extreme measure would.
  • A great plus point in starting to follow a program high in nutrition: You will have good hair and skin on top of losing a few pounds, and best of all, PEACE when you need to face the music (or the people)
  • However, if you follow a drastic measure you will have exactly the opposite outcome: No significant weight loss and breakouts that usually goes along with irregular eating and stress. Also, depriving yourself like that can lead to binging, which can cause you to gain weight!

 

There are no short cuts, it takes a journey. However, this occasion can be the beginning of a journey to freedom for you…

Here’s a  prescription for you before the special event:

SIMPLICITY: If you feel like you have too many things to pull off every day it will just add to your anxiety. So make a commitment to yourself and God to just do 3 THINGS:

1. TIME IN THE WORD EVERY DAY, NO MATTER WHAT! Change that time every morning when you usually make plans for the day, and promise yourself that you will not eat sugar and carbs into a time when you are just honest with yourself and God. Tell Him that you can not do it at all, and ask Him to take over. I recommend you get a Bible study that can keep your attention, because you will probably find it extremely hard to focus on anything right now, due to the underlying stress. See my list of Recommended Books and Bible Studies

2. EXERCISE 3-5 DAYS A WEEK, NO MATTER WHAT! Please read last week’s post about Just Showing Up This is so important because it will help you stay on track with your eating and emotional well being. Also, read my other posts on exercise and have a look at the books I recommend to get you motivated. Even very moderate exercise such as slow walking will make the world of a difference in your emotional well being and your ability to resist temptation. Commit to doing this in order for you to stay sane; come rain or sunshine, whether you’ve binged the night before or not, whether you feel good or bad, whether you are depressed and have a lot to do. If you can do it first thing every morning, it will be great (also for burning more calories and having a better day food wise), but even if you have to go to the gym 9 pm at night, just stick to your commitment.

3. As far as food: Sign up for a program that has GREAT SUPPORT AND ACCOUNTABILITY. All the programs that I’ve followed in the past (never mind how healthy and balanced) did not work for long when I was doing it all by myself. The ones that really stuck were the ones high in nutrients and variety, and where I had either the support of a GROUP or a COACH. Please have a look at Week 4 of my program if you need more information on this.

Now, after saying all of this, I have to remind you: There is no condemnation for you in Christ Jesus! God is so thrilled that you set your feet on this journey back to Him where your healing lays. If you fall, He will run to your aid, and if you can not overcome this specific situation due to all the stress and pain you still feel, He will be waiting for you… until you’re ready.

And seriously, there is no condemnation coming from this girl either. I know about the pain and how we each have our own time frame of when we’re ready to surrender. I also know that if everybody else gives up on us, GOD DOES NOT!

If you feel that you can not do anything I’ve said, then please have a look at my program or go for counseling. Talking to a counselor or a pastor who has some knowledge about food struggles can help you find the reason why you so desperately need to lose weight, while you still desperately need the food to “cope”. You might find yourself between a rock and a hard place my friend, and then you really need help.

I pray even now that this upcoming event will be the last straw for every lady who reads this post. I pray that it will be the thing that opens your eyes to the truth, makes you hit rock-bottom, and help you to surrender your food struggle to God, forever…

You are so loved dear sister… the Bible says His eyes are on you!

In His Love
Heleen

More Resources for you NEW: INDIVIDUAL COUNSELING online or in Beaverton Oregon
Call Heleen at (503) 914-2749 or Schedule online: www.LifeSolutions.io

Click on the image below to learn more about the 12 Week Online Program: Women Struggling with Food

Read my story. Click on the image below to download my ebook: God will I ever be free?

Appetite for Freedom WORKBOOK and DVD.
A great resource for small groups or individual use.
Click on the image below to find out more:


How to Get UP When You Fall

Seriously, let me get this off my chest and let you off the hook at the same time: It’s not IF we fall, but rather WHEN we fall. All of the people around you that seem to have it so together and make huge successes of their lives have learned only ONE thing that you didn’t: HOW TO GET UP!

We live in such a broken world, and yes it’s not fair that we have to carry our cross on our hips (literally) while others hide theirs under their tiny sweaters, but we all struggle with something. Everybody has bad days, and EVERYBODY FALLS!

If you have an eating disorder or struggle with food addiction, you need to realize that RECOVERY IS A JOURNEY, and yes, the journey can be long and exhausting.
In spite of significant victories and years without sugar, you might find yourself in front of the freezer, eating ice cream straight from the tub when life throws you a curveball.

Now don’t think for a minute that I don’t believe in miraculous healing. I believe that God can and will heal you from food addiction in an instant if He so chooses. However, if His will for you is to walk out your journey to freedom, then I would advise you to arm yourself for the trip. To say “I will never, ever, ever fall for that again” is just setting yourself up for failure, self-condemnation, guilt, and shame.

So now that we’ve established that you and I are not the only ones with wobbly legs, the question remains: How do you get up?

What is the first thing that comes to mind after you have fallen and your eating is spiraling out of control? I’m not talking about the pre-fall-stage where you’re still toying with a bit of this here and a morsel of that there, because at that point you might still feel that you have things under control. No, I’m talking about the flat-on-you-face-stage where you know you’ve once again lost all power, you binged for one week straight, all you can think of is your next meal, and you’ve easily gained five to ten pounds. When you hit that place, you know you’re on your knees, you don’t wonder anymore.

Usually, I experience the following emotions and thoughts after a fall: First guilt, then shame, followed by its evil twin; self-condemnation. Then I usually I start looking around for someone to blame. In the end, despair and hopelessness will sweep over me, and the enemy will whisper in my ear “You will never overcome this, you might as well give up.”

I know all too well how intense these emotions of hopelessness can be and therefore I want to reach out my hand to you in your place of despair and tell you: VICTORY IS NOT FAR AWAY, BUT YOU HAVE TO ACT QUICKLY!

The enemy can gain so much ground in our lives if we stay down. The longer you stay in that place, the deeper you will sink. That place where you have fallen can change into a pit of captivity that can be your home for the next few months or even years.

WHAT NOT TO DO:

1. Don’t look for a diet. Resist the urge to go on the internet and read up for hours on the latest diets out there. You will end up eating stacks of food while trying to find a “quick-fix” that DOES NOT EXIST.
2. Don’t go over every little detail trying to figure out how it happened. It probably happened gradually, and you can not change the past. Rather spend your energy on getting up and moving forward.
3. Don’t blame your husband, your kids, your friends, my program, or God for your fall. Okay if you have to blame someone, start with the devil and then take responsibility. The blame game will ruin your relationships and keep you laying down longer.

WHAT TO DO:

1. ALWAYS GET BACK TO BASICS! Diets don’t work, pills don’t work, excessive exercise doesn’t work, and starvation ends in binging and purging. So throw out that Chinese food and chocolates and go stock up on vegetables, fruit, lean meats, granola bars for those weak moments and oatmeal for those carb cravings. Make a few salads, cut up some fruit and cook a chicken to be prepared for the first three tough days. YOU ONLY NEED THAT FIRST DAY OF VICTORY TO TURN THIS THING AROUND! You might have a week of working it up to that FIRST DAY, and that’s okay, but keep trying until you get there…

2. TAKE IT TO GOD: Number One will not work if you don’t give it over to God! LIVING HEALTHY IS JUST ANOTHER DIET IF YOU DON’T SURRENDER IT TO GOD! Believe me, after a fall you need a good cry before God. You might not know it, but at this point, you might be avoiding God because you are ashamed. Also, you may be disappointed in Him for letting you down, AGAIN.
Tell God how you feel, it’s not He who fails us, but He does understand that we feel that way sometimes because He so understands our human nature. Not only did He create you, But He also became flesh, and although He never sinned, He understands. ESTABLISHING A DAILY TIME WITH, GOD WILL BE THE ONLY THING THAT WILL HELP YOU UP EVERY TIME YOU FALL, PLEASE TRUST ME ON THIS ONE.

3. GET MOVING! You know it, there’s no easy way to say it, YOU HAVE TO FIND A WAY TO GET ACTIVE! Read my article on “Hate to Exercise?”. Exercise is a huge motivator to eat healthily. It also helps you fight depression and lack of energy that usually accompanies this struggle. Don’t make any more excuses! Never mind how great your obstacle, someone else has a bigger one, and God has an answer. So ask Him to help you find a way to get active DAILY!

5. TELL SOMEONE! After talking to God about it, tell a friend, a spouse or a counselor that you’ve fallen. If you don’t have anybody, please email me about it. I will be happy to pray for you and encourage you in any way I can. It is so important to tell someone else because there is freedom in getting the truth out there. It also gives us a clean slate to start fresh, and it always helps to be accountable to someone else. Don’t let the enemy have a field day because you are too proud to admit that you have fallen. We all fall! I write about all my failures and nose dives on this blog for exactly this reason: To not give any room to the enemy by living a lie, and to encourage you to NOT FOCUS ON THE FALL, BUT IMMEDIATELY GET BUSY WITH GETTING UP!

Don’t keep laying down; it only opens a door for bitterness and unbelief. You don’t need those in your life: YOUR GOD IS JEHOVAH RAPHA (THE LORD YOUR HEALER), AND HE’S STANDING RIGHT NEXT TO YOU WITH HIS HAND EXTENDED, JUST WAITING FOR YOU TO TAKE IT, GET UP, REPENT, FORGIVE YOURSELF AND KEEP GOING!

Proverbs 24:16 (NIV)
“for though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again, but the wicked are brought down by calamity”.

You can do it, girl, get up again and keep running the race.

Heleen

 

Please click on the links below to learn more:

NEW: Individual Counseling ONLINE or in BEAVERTON, OR
Call Heleen at (503) 914-2749 or
Schedule online: www.LifeSolutions.io

Fend off the 4pm Munchies

I battled the 4pm munchies for as long as I can remember. I’ve tried many things to fend it off, but in the end the best advise I got was to just go with it. Not go with it as in give in to visions of chocolate and french fries, but rather go with my body’s natural inclination to want food that time of day.

When it comes to eating at certain times, I found that eating six small meals a day and listening to my body’s natural clues works by far the best for me. It helps even out my energy levels, make me perform at my best and prevent overeating. I’ve tried skimming on snacks to loose extra pounds for years, but somehow it always turned on me: Never mind how big a plate of food I had at lunch time, by 4pm I would be wrestling with my cravings.

Now, I know I’m not alone in this. I’ve heard this same complaint from my working friends. A dear friend informs me that she hits the vending machine, every day, promptly at 4pm. What baffles her is that her days always go so great at first: Cereal for breakfast, sub sandwich or salad for lunch, and then boom! round about 4pm she throws all caution in the wind, head for the vending machine and gobble up a few candy bars.

For some of us who work from home the munchies can be ever so real. Never mind what you’re working on, being it the never ending laundry, lovin’ on those little ones, or typing away at your laptop, you are not immune.

The smart people tell me that it is important for our health and mental well being to keep our energy level steady. This can truly only be achieved by eating small amounts of healthy food, frequently. So diets, starvation, binging and overeating all sends us on a roller coaster ride that will put Six Flags to shame. Energy levels go up and come crashing down, emotions fly all over the place and our health is in serious danger.

So maybe you want to join me and “go with it” for a while. Follow your body’s signals, be ready for those 4pm munchies with snack that you love but that can also help to even out your energy level.

My favorite 4pm snack for the last few months has been my own version of Tiramisu. I pour a little bit of fresh decaf coffee in a fancy bowl, add some granola (the good kind made with oats and honey) add a few pecan nuts, a dollop of low fat vanilla yogurt, and on a special day, a squirt of light whipped cream. I sit down, put my feet up and give in to the 4pm munchies, and what do you know, afterward I can actually fold some laundry, type a blog, help with some high school math (not really) or jump trampoline with my two little “bundles of energy” before dinner!

Here’s a few Tips for you

THINGS TO DO WHEN THE MUNCHIES HIT:

1. Try drinking water, you might just be dehydrated

2. Get moving! Exercise is another great source of energy, and you might just be bored or in need of some fresh air. Going to the gym at 4pm actually helped me overcome huge carb cravings for a season

3. Make sure that you add enough lean protein and whole grain to your lunch meal, otherwise you will be starving just a couple of hours afterward

4. Check yourself to see if something upset you or made you anxious. Try lying on your bed or sitting in your favorite chair with music on. Talk to God or just wait in His presence. Your craving might have nothing to do with hunger after all

5. If this keeps happening every day, wise up, your body might need nutrition that time of day. Rather plan ahead to have a light mid-afternoon meal daily, this will put you at ease and prevent overeating at lunch time

6. You might simply be exhausted and a power nap (15-20 minutes of sleep) will perk you right up!

7. Make sure you really need to eat something, wait a few minutes, do something else that consume your thoughts, such as reading, talking to a friend or taking a long bath. The urge to nibble might just vanish!

THINGS NOT TO DO! ABSOLUTELY NOT! NEVER EVER!:

1. Go grocery shopping when you have the munchies

2. Watch mid-afternoon TV. All the food commercials WILL bring on more cravings!

3. Eat a snack high in sugar, salt and fat. This will not satisfy you but rather increase your cravings and keep you grazing until bedtime (believe me, I know)

4. Move in the direction of the vending machine when the clock strikes 4!

GREAT SNACKS TO FEND OFF THOSE 4PM MUNCHIES:

Fresh or dried fruit
Low fat granola bar
Slice of whole grain bread with peanut butter and sliced banana! Yum!
Cereal with low fat milk
Vegetable/Bean soup
Pretzels and low fat string cheese
Low fat popcorn and a handful of nuts
Pitta bread with hummus

IF ALL ELSE FAILS TURN TO: Heleen’s Special “Tiramisu”

Living with the “Brain Fog” of Food Addiction

People who struggle with Food Addiction use food in similar ways as others do drugs, cigarettes or alcohol. It is used to numb unwanted emotions and it actually does! If you have an overload of sugar, fat, and salt in your system, you actually experience a “high”. It’s a state of mind where you just live for the moment, food is all that matters and for a few moments at least, it can make you forget about your sorrows.

Of course, you always regret it afterward. However, it’s not necessarily a deep regret that brings you to repentance, but rather something similar to the alcoholic who cries when he is in a drunken state. It’s usual feelings of self-pity and self-loathing, but unfortunately mostly not the deep sorrow that makes you want to turn away from the addictive foods for good.

If you struggle with food addiction, you might recognize this pattern where you overeat at night, feel sick to your stomach, cry tears of despair, and promise yourself to never do this again, just to repeat the same cycle again the next day. It breaks my heart to see friends and family go through this cycle many times before they hit “rock-bottom”. I know the horrible feeling of utter failure.

There is another side to addiction that causes people to stay in the same rut, year after year:

The “Brain Fog”. Food Addiction, like other addictions, covers your brain with a numbness, causing you to make wrong decisions, lack sound judgment, and not hear the voice of God. In my life, the feeling of numbness toward God and my loved ones became one of the big warning signs that I am slipping back into food addiction. Huge amounts of sugar, fat and salt can literally sap all your energy, make you depressed and pull a thick cloud of fog over your brain and your emotions. It is a horrible, empty life to lead: You pretend that all is well on the outside, but your heart has been stripped of all life.

Many books have been written about food addiction, but people still tend to make light of it. So even if you are skeptical about whether people can truly be addicted to food, I want to urge you to take a hard look at your own life. The enemy uses food to keep people in a lifetime of bondage. However, it is important to know that not everyone with an eating disorder suffers from food addiction, but those with food addiction usually have some form of distorted eating such as bulimia, binge eating disorder or compulsive overeating.

Also, hereditary factors tend to play a major role in food addiction. If there is a pattern of addiction in your family or you have been addicted to other substances at different times in your life, you have a bigger chance to also get addicted to food.

How then can this be treated?
From my own experience and the testimonies of other ladies, I believe that some people sunk so deep into food addiction that their spirit (deep inner being that connects with God) can not respond to God before they don’t first clear the “brain fog”. Now before you get upset with me, I do believe and have seen God heal people from addiction in a moment. However, to forge a deeper, lasting relationship with God these people too had to become “clean” from high amounts of sugar, fat and salt and stay that way. It is sometimes necessary to first become abstinent from certain food before our past wounds can be healed, simply because the food that we are addicted to keeps us in a state of numbness.

That said, you should never just stop eating. You are setting yourself up to sink deeper into food addiction if you starve your body. You need your body to “help” you with the physical healing from this addiction. So you first have to get it strong. In my Program, I help women go through the necessary steps to first get their bodies to work for them, not against them. I always recommend going through a period of “restoring” your body first. I’m simply talking about getting enough sleep, drinking lots of water, exercising, and eating enough protein, whole grains, as well as fresh fruit and vegetables for a few weeks before abstaining from anything. However, there is good news, it only takes 21 days to rid your body of certain cravings, and after the first 7 days, it actually gets a little easier. I am always so amazed at how the cravings TOTALLY disappear after 21 days!

But far bigger than the lack of cravings for everything deep fried and smothered in chocolate is the joy of being able to FEEL again. Your senses come alive, and you can cry and laugh and feel the gentle touch of God as He heals your broken heart.

My 12 Week Online Program for Women struggling with Food might be an option for you if you need help to break free from Food Addiction. Please go have a look, your life matters to God. He is waiting to heal you and help you clear up the “brain fog” so you can enjoy life again.

Your sister in Christ
Heleen

Resources:

NEW: INDIVIDUAL COUNSELING online or in Beaverton Oregon
Call Heleen at (503) 914-2749 or Schedule online: www.LifeSolutions.io

Click on the image below to learn more about the 12 Week Online Program: Women Struggling with Food

Read my story. Click on the image below to download my ebook: God will I ever be free?

Appetite for Freedom WORKBOOK and DVD.
A great resource for small groups or individual use.
Click on the image below to find out more: